What you might ask?
Well, why people are so overweight or course!
I know, you are asking how so many people have tried and I, your lowly want-to-be wordsmith has come to the final conclusion?
Some think it is genetics, some lazy, some bad eating habits, more with the lazy thoughts, some say TV, and some blame reincarnation issues from there previous alien bodies …
I am going to start a new line of though if you will.
I am going with because it makes God happy!
O go ahead and throw the whole “Genesis 1:27 - And God created man in His own image” then also in “Corinthians 6:19 - Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit” and how we need to respect it and treat it well and all that jazz.
Now, to my thoughts on this matter!
God created us in his image and resides in us so we are supposed to be a temple of respect in his image.
I’m good with this, honestly I am, but when was the last time anyone has scene the BIG GUY though?
What I am saying it, over time our bodies change.
Joints start to hurt a little, wrinkles form and our hair turns a different color.
The big one though is, we normally gain weight.
Now I think that this must be the natural progression of the human form, and because we are made in God’s form for him also.
Yes people are fatter today because more people, who must be closer to God then the rest, are taking on a closer form and look like God.
O, you think that I am throwing out blasphemies aren’t you.
I disagree!
We have a population of more then any other time.
We have more evil in the world then ever before.
God has a lot of enemies right now and putting them all ‘under his foot’ is taking awhile because, let’s face it, times are tough!
So, let’s say I am getting a little older and working like 16 hours a day do I really have time or the energy to go home eat healthy and then work out too?
I can totally see God coming home at the end of the day smacking Jesus and Michael on their backs saying what a good job they have done you know throwing flaming swords around and saving people and just longing to eat real fast and then get some sleep before he has to start up ruling the universe in the morning … again …
So God, being all knowing and powerful, does what is the most efficient to get this schedule going as quickly as possible.
He swings by the big Golden Arches in the Sky!
You know they are there we have heard for years and years about St. Peter standing out in front of them after all!
(We all saw what happened to Morgan Spurlock in Super Size Me after all.)
So, now on to the other side of my point …
We are destroying the world by building everything we can think of everywhere they let us.
This leads us to fewer places to bury our dead …
So more people are getting cremated …
I know you have no clue were I am going with this one …
So reading through “Leviticus 3” it tells us why this is important …
(Wow even I feel a little dirty typing this out so I had better at least get a ‘Wow that’s messed up” smirk out of you people!)
God says to Moses that if people are to make a communion sacrifice they need to take all of the fatty organs and fat in general and burn it because this gives God a ‘Restful Odor”.
You all with me now?
That’s right, cremating fat people makes god Happy because as Jesus said to us after all that we are ‘Sheep’.
I am not sure why God likes the smell of burning fat, I might ask him right before he throws me into that long pit to hell, but the Bible does say it and I am just connecting the dots … without numbers I might add so I am getting all kinds of strange images!Yea, I know, all that for a big build up to nothing good, and possibly a straight shot into hell for my blasphemies.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Things you might not know …
A person in my life about 6 months ago said something to me that hurt me like he had no clue.
It was profound enough for me to actually stand up for myself, mind you all, and you might not know it, I don’t do that very often.
Sure I will stand up for anyone else but that’s a different story.
I normally let things slide and try to not cause many problems especially when it comes to people I know and deal with on a daily basis.
… You all only see me when I am mad or around others so shush you just don’t know!
I put up with a lot over the years, and a lot of you have heard some about it but this was the final straw.
He said that I wasn’t injured enough to use the VA.
He assumed that I don’t have the right to have access to something that is there for people like me.
He showed that people who don’t know have no clue.
People, who think they know, don’t have a clue.
People, who work with these people, don’t have a clue.
I was talking to a co-worker and he was telling me about Vietnam.
Wow, you ever think that you have it bad let me have you sit down with some of these guys.
He was the ‘point man’ for his unit for 6 months, he had white sulfurous hit him in the face, he was forced to jump into some punji sticks, a lot of other things for another time and story, but in the end he got back and was treated poorly by his fellow American’s.
I had nothing like that, wow nothing at all like that.
We had some fun issues ourselves but only one today I wanted to talk about.
Ready for it?
It was profound enough for me to actually stand up for myself, mind you all, and you might not know it, I don’t do that very often.
Sure I will stand up for anyone else but that’s a different story.
I normally let things slide and try to not cause many problems especially when it comes to people I know and deal with on a daily basis.
… You all only see me when I am mad or around others so shush you just don’t know!
I put up with a lot over the years, and a lot of you have heard some about it but this was the final straw.
He said that I wasn’t injured enough to use the VA.
He assumed that I don’t have the right to have access to something that is there for people like me.
He showed that people who don’t know have no clue.
People, who think they know, don’t have a clue.
People, who work with these people, don’t have a clue.
I was talking to a co-worker and he was telling me about Vietnam.
Wow, you ever think that you have it bad let me have you sit down with some of these guys.
He was the ‘point man’ for his unit for 6 months, he had white sulfurous hit him in the face, he was forced to jump into some punji sticks, a lot of other things for another time and story, but in the end he got back and was treated poorly by his fellow American’s.
I had nothing like that, wow nothing at all like that.
We had some fun issues ourselves but only one today I wanted to talk about.
Ready for it?
Wait, let me bounce real quick …
AMERICAN IDOL!!!
I know I need help but I love this crazy show!Simon cracks me up, Randy is a fool, Paula is a drug addict and then the new girl … Kara Dioguardi … yea good times!
I know I need help but I love this crazy show!Simon cracks me up, Randy is a fool, Paula is a drug addict and then the new girl … Kara Dioguardi … yea good times!
One of the problems I have from my military time is I can’t go on American Idol.
To the point though, the reason I can’t go on this show.
They at some point make you sing a song of their choice.
I know this doesn’t sound so bad, I mean I have the voice of a thousand little angels after all … although some people say more like angels who are being torched in Hell, or even torturing the angels in Hell … but so not the point!
I was watching this wonderful show yet again and it popped into my mind that I couldn’t do it.
No, again not because of my lovely voice, or my age because lets face it once they see me they would wave that rule just on my looks … be nice people they let Norman on there!
It is because they might make me sing that one song, you know the one.
Then I would have to say I am sorry and walk off the stage upsetting all of my loyal followers once again.
You don’t know the one?
How is that possible?
Let me tell you a story then …(Fade to black … no not that rocking Metalica song just the color!)
Picture if you will me getting off a plane in Cairo, Egypt and getting bussed off to the port to unload.
(Even that young, I looked that good!)
We arrive and low and behold they are playing American Music, how kind, doesn’t it feel like home …
After a few hours of not paying attention we noted that they have already played this song and wait for the next one to see if it is a short tape and they only have a few songs on it.
The same song played again, then again and again.
24 hours a day and 7 days a week we heard the same song over and over.
Gloria Gaynor’s I will Survive.
Now Freddie Perren and Dino Fekaris never had a clue that the song that they had written would not only one day be a female empowerment song, or even an anthem for abused people, but I have faith that they NEVER would have guessed it would be used as psychological warfare.
I spoke to another friend of mine who was over there a few years before me and he said they did the same thing to him but they played Meatloaf’s Bat out of Hell.
I have no clue who had it worse back then but I think I win now because my song is still on the radio!
Now, you might ask what this does to me … when I hear the song I get a little upset.
That’s putting it nicely I think … I want to hit something, hard and a lot and until it stops moving.
The other problem is the solders over there would sing it too us.
So I associate Arabic people with this song too.
I would like to say that I am not a racist per say … but then I would be a liar I fear.
It doesn’t matter fat or thin, tall or short, attractive or like the others, I get angry when I see them.
I don’t know how others do it when in regards to Blacks, Hispanic or other races.
I mean, I don’t know how people can hate a whole people just because of the few extremists within it, or a group because they have a different faith … or how you can classify Jewish as a ‘race’ but that’s again another Blog.
That is all, normally, a learned behavior or in some people just something in the back of their head we might never understand.
Me though, and some of the people I know who went through this also, I feel have a reason.
I am not going to go out of my way to be mean or hurtful or negative in any way toward them.
I will avoid them because I know that it wasn’t them who did this to me but in the end … I want to hurt them.
How is it fair that I want to do this?
This person who I don’t know, who could have come up with the cure for some nasty disease or saved thousands by turning on their own people and stopping another World Trade Center attack from happening.
It doesn’t matter, I in some form or another hate them.
I know it’s wrong, I know it’s bad, I even feel bad about it while it is happening … doesn’t’ mean I can stop it.
Back to some point though … because I can’t hear or God forbid sing that song I can’t pursue my goal of winning American Idol, that makes me mad yet again and pushes the issue even further.
Knowing that because of a few peoples actions, I will have a negative reaction for the rest of my life
This is one of the things I have to deal with.
It isn’t a physical problem, but God Damn it, it is something that only a few people know about and it is something that hurts and bothers me in ways this person who said I can’t use the VA because I wasn’t hurt enough, can’t understand.
Physically, I must be because they decided to give me money every month because so many parts of me don’t work.
Mentally, I still have a constant memory loss and no childhood per say.
This one though, this one could get bad and ugly really fast.
God help me, or the person I see if I come across an Arabic person singing I Will Survive!
I am not joking and or trying to make a joke … but I don’t think they will, survive that is.
That’s just another thing I have to deal with and have a constant fear of.
I spend the rest of my life in prison abandoning and ruining La Wife’s life because some poor soul decided to sing to them self.
Yea, I have issues but because of people like me, no much better then me, you don’t have to have them.
I am just blessed that mine are so mild and wonder how so many others can even live with it.
So many people were killed from these conflicts.
So many over there, some from the injuries they sustained over time and then the few who couldn’t survive because of the problems left in their heads.
My issues are mild to say the least, these other men and women though.
Some of them just can’t find their way back home, and it’s been so long.
La Wife has joked to me about some of the stuff I did when I got back … the life I lived and the people I dated.
That’s how I dealt with it I think …
I am glad that that is all I did, I stayed away from drugs and alcohol some how …
That’s what I have to deal with … what will this next group have to deal with?
Also, aren’t you glad that they are out there so you don’t have to be …
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Dirty Mind Test …
Most of you know how I feel about religion … it’s full of liars, hypocrites and just evil people trying to get the best of others.
Not everyone is evil, a liar or a hypocrite … but enough for me to say that the whole batch is ruined.
I have found a few signs though that I think might prove my point.
Either bad people are leading these local churches or stupid people … either way more proof that I should not go to either.Lets have a look shall we?
Hum ...
Um ... trying to say that God can ... do anything he wishes with anything he has?
Kind of like the old saying 'We who have done so much, for so long, with so little, are now able to do anythign with nothing' ... right?
Wait ... WHAT?
Not everyone is evil, a liar or a hypocrite … but enough for me to say that the whole batch is ruined.
I have found a few signs though that I think might prove my point.
Either bad people are leading these local churches or stupid people … either way more proof that I should not go to either.Lets have a look shall we?
Hum ...
Um ... trying to say that God can ... do anything he wishes with anything he has?
Kind of like the old saying 'We who have done so much, for so long, with so little, are now able to do anythign with nothing' ... right?
Wait ... WHAT?
Wow, OK I can see what they are going for ... at the alter praying right?
I got nothing ... that's just perverted!
La Wife left me …
That’s right, I have done it again.
No lie, La Wife left me ... to no real surprise, right?
I have run off another woman who I thought was the one.
I would think that it was me, but come on, we all know that that is not an option.
This La Wife left but was much nicer then my last La Wife.
She left me with the dog, the new house and the car.
I would love to go on about how bad she was and how things are better without her, but, that would be a lie.
You all wanted in on my life so here it is.
My life is very miserable!
O, I still have a dog this time around and I can pay my bills without having to sell blood and marrow this time around.
I also have the positive outlook of I am not so new to the area and this time it wasn’t a few days before a BIG birthday.
The end result though is still in the same boat, I am all alone once again.
I am not sure of what I am going to do but I am glad that I have some friends to fall back on.
You never realize how good some friends are until times like this pop up.
You also learn how much your family really does care about you in your time of need.
Friday night I will be in Orlando and Saturday I will be in Tampa with friends but then Sunday will roll around and all I will be able to do is to think about La Wife.
The long horrible loneliness will roll over me once again and I will be stuck rolled up in a ball crying.
This time I will have Wonder Dog though …
Just keeping everyone in the loop and if you all want feel free to call or bring me food … I can tell already it is going to be a Slim Fast weekend of easy meals.
We all knew it was going to happen, I mean she is way to good for me anyway and I was just holding her back anyway.
I hope that she has fun and finds true happiness and I only wish her the best!
So, that’s that, I am going to go get a drink and go to sleep.
See ya Sunday La Wife I hope you have a blast at the convention!
No lie, La Wife left me ... to no real surprise, right?
I have run off another woman who I thought was the one.
I would think that it was me, but come on, we all know that that is not an option.
This La Wife left but was much nicer then my last La Wife.
She left me with the dog, the new house and the car.
I would love to go on about how bad she was and how things are better without her, but, that would be a lie.
You all wanted in on my life so here it is.
My life is very miserable!
O, I still have a dog this time around and I can pay my bills without having to sell blood and marrow this time around.
I also have the positive outlook of I am not so new to the area and this time it wasn’t a few days before a BIG birthday.
The end result though is still in the same boat, I am all alone once again.
I am not sure of what I am going to do but I am glad that I have some friends to fall back on.
You never realize how good some friends are until times like this pop up.
You also learn how much your family really does care about you in your time of need.
Friday night I will be in Orlando and Saturday I will be in Tampa with friends but then Sunday will roll around and all I will be able to do is to think about La Wife.
The long horrible loneliness will roll over me once again and I will be stuck rolled up in a ball crying.
This time I will have Wonder Dog though …
Just keeping everyone in the loop and if you all want feel free to call or bring me food … I can tell already it is going to be a Slim Fast weekend of easy meals.
We all knew it was going to happen, I mean she is way to good for me anyway and I was just holding her back anyway.
I hope that she has fun and finds true happiness and I only wish her the best!
So, that’s that, I am going to go get a drink and go to sleep.
See ya Sunday La Wife I hope you have a blast at the convention!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Needed Update …
Fine you want something to entertain you now do you?
Lets see if this works …
…
Um
…
Yea
…
I got nothing, sorry.
How about this then …
We are cat sitting, if you don’t know how I feel about cats, well, yea I am being a nice guy and that’s all that needs to be said.
I do think that this kitty will fit in a potato gun though … hum this might not be so bad after all … sorry back to the point …we, for the few who do not know have a dog.
The fun you all miss!
Lets see if this works …
…
Um
…
Yea
…
I got nothing, sorry.
How about this then …
We are cat sitting, if you don’t know how I feel about cats, well, yea I am being a nice guy and that’s all that needs to be said.
I do think that this kitty will fit in a potato gun though … hum this might not be so bad after all … sorry back to the point …we, for the few who do not know have a dog.
We thought that she would be a good dog and get a long with said kitten.
Now we know that they wouldn’t be best friends but kind of hoped that they could be friends ...
But we thought that it might work out in some way or another.
Yea, the little mistakes can sometimes be the best right?
Wonder Dog and Fuzzy Pawed Demon were both on the bed.
I was holding Wonder Dog and La Wife was holding Fuzzy Pawed Demon when all of the sodden with no way of knowing that it was going to happen Wonder Dog got the brilliant ideal that putting Fuzzy Pawed Demon head in her mouth.
Yea
So She didn’t bite down or growl or anything just kind of wanted to know what Fuzzy Pawed Demon head tasted like.
Fuzzy Pawed Demon had no clue what was going on and just sat there in a complete state of shock … Catatonic if you will … O’ come on, that’s funny stuff right there!
Wonder Dog let go and Fuzzy Pawed Demon sat still and at a loss as to what just happened when all of the sudden Wonder Dog needed another taste … and got one.
Fuzzy Pawed Demon sat there once again as we pulled Wonder Dog away and then they went there separate ways.
Yea, the little mistakes can sometimes be the best right?
Wonder Dog and Fuzzy Pawed Demon were both on the bed.
I was holding Wonder Dog and La Wife was holding Fuzzy Pawed Demon when all of the sodden with no way of knowing that it was going to happen Wonder Dog got the brilliant ideal that putting Fuzzy Pawed Demon head in her mouth.
Yea
So She didn’t bite down or growl or anything just kind of wanted to know what Fuzzy Pawed Demon head tasted like.
Fuzzy Pawed Demon had no clue what was going on and just sat there in a complete state of shock … Catatonic if you will … O’ come on, that’s funny stuff right there!
Wonder Dog let go and Fuzzy Pawed Demon sat still and at a loss as to what just happened when all of the sudden Wonder Dog needed another taste … and got one.
Fuzzy Pawed Demon sat there once again as we pulled Wonder Dog away and then they went there separate ways.
Wonder Dog into the living room, by force mind you, and Fuzzy Pawed Demon behind the toilet for the next three days.
So, now Wonder Dog sits at the bathroom door awaiting a chance to get under the door.
We now find her sitting around with her eyes closed in front of said door in what looks like she is praying.
Mind you Fuzzy Pawed Demon is doing the exact opposite and only trying to figure out a way of making her plans work out as best they could possibly could …
If said Fuzzy Pawed Demon does find a way to make her plans work out Wonder Dog needs to go hide because retaliations will be bad I fear!
She will need to learn new skills like ...
The fun you all miss!
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Speaking about Miami …
So I was talking to a friend I have down in Miami aka ‘The not so Mother Land’ and it came up how the classes in school are bilingual and how you can actually graduate without knowing the language.
This lead to how all of the signs are in Spanish or some other goobly gook that I don’t speak and we started hating on how we have let this happen.
The American language is English the last time I checked but some how the lands south of the Everglades have not heard about this.
Or they did hear it but didn’t understand it because it wasn’t in Spanish?
This needs to be fixed!
I am all about the melting pot effect and bringing over your culture and blah blah blah but come one.
I am actually from down there and I can’t speak to anyone?
I think I have come up with an ideal on how to fix this situation and I am afraid that I might be the only one left who is capable of doing it.
I am willing to take one for the team but it might have lasting effects that none of us are ready for … we might long and want the effects but the first response’s might be a little strange with a lot of gasping and shocking from the onlookers.
I will expect my face on Mt. Rushmore and to be at least nominated as a write in for President after I have completed my mission for this great Country of ours!
I being of a somewhat sound mind, and of reasonable health, (No matter what my Dr. might say) … am thinking about (Because of my ADD though I will forget tomorrow so lets not put a lot of faith into my words) … taking back the ‘South!’
How you might ask?
Brace yourself this is so simple and I can’t believe it has taken so long to come up with, but brilliance cannot be rushed!
I am going to go down and with my charming good looks and my super persuasive personality, I am going to force myself into the mix of all the collage age girls.
I hear it now, how could this help?
Step 1) Well because I am just so darn attractive and woman swoon as I walk by … (Not because I have a Flatulence problem like some people I know!) I will win them all over and they will all want to be with me.
Step 2) After this happens I will not speak to any of them unless they can speak in English.
The few who don’t I will be forced to threaten to smack them.
The effect of a violence threat will make them think I am a ‘Bad Boy’ causing them to want me, and then they too will submit to my plans as well.
Step 3) The men will then see that the hot Gringo is stealing all of the women and they will think it is because I speak English and have an American accent so they will then learn the true local lingo as well trying to win back there women.
With no effect I might add, you can’t fight what I have!
Positive Side effects equal - All of the younger people speak English and then teach there children and then they teach there children so that in just 2 generations I have had the effect that I was attempting to draw forth.
It might be 4 or 5 generations but we are still talking about the same amount of years though … they just reproduce faster then the normal Americans.
Another positive effect is after I run for President I will have all of the Hispanic woman in the ‘South’, or ‘Northern Cuba’ as some might call, it vote for me!
Now I will need a few things to get my mission up and going but I think if I pitch it the right way to Congress and the House that I might be able to get a grant to live and party in South Beach … yea this might work after all …
First - I will need a ‘Hoopty’.
Nothing special but something borderline classic with all the additions.
You know, hydraulics, 7-coat paint that changes in the light as you look at it, ground effects and a stereo and speaker set up that could kill people from the bass.
Second - I will need to go back old school to the 70’s and bust out the Pimp outfit.
That’s right, purple leisure suit with matching hat and a giant feather … anyone have some of the boots with fish swimming in the heels anymore?
Third - I might need a knife … nothing like Dundee had but something to show that I mean business … switchblade might work but I don’t want to seem to cocky with anything bigger.
Gun … no this is going to be friendly I hope …
Now I do foresee a few problems.
One, some of the gangs are going to be upset with me taking all of there women.
Luckily I studied martial arts for a summer and the military showed me how to be a ninja … sorta … not really but this is my story so shut up already!If they get to mouthy I’ll smack them too!
This lead to how all of the signs are in Spanish or some other goobly gook that I don’t speak and we started hating on how we have let this happen.
The American language is English the last time I checked but some how the lands south of the Everglades have not heard about this.
Or they did hear it but didn’t understand it because it wasn’t in Spanish?
This needs to be fixed!
I am all about the melting pot effect and bringing over your culture and blah blah blah but come one.
I am actually from down there and I can’t speak to anyone?
I think I have come up with an ideal on how to fix this situation and I am afraid that I might be the only one left who is capable of doing it.
I am willing to take one for the team but it might have lasting effects that none of us are ready for … we might long and want the effects but the first response’s might be a little strange with a lot of gasping and shocking from the onlookers.
I will expect my face on Mt. Rushmore and to be at least nominated as a write in for President after I have completed my mission for this great Country of ours!
I being of a somewhat sound mind, and of reasonable health, (No matter what my Dr. might say) … am thinking about (Because of my ADD though I will forget tomorrow so lets not put a lot of faith into my words) … taking back the ‘South!’
How you might ask?
Brace yourself this is so simple and I can’t believe it has taken so long to come up with, but brilliance cannot be rushed!
I am going to go down and with my charming good looks and my super persuasive personality, I am going to force myself into the mix of all the collage age girls.
I hear it now, how could this help?
Step 1) Well because I am just so darn attractive and woman swoon as I walk by … (Not because I have a Flatulence problem like some people I know!) I will win them all over and they will all want to be with me.
Step 2) After this happens I will not speak to any of them unless they can speak in English.
The few who don’t I will be forced to threaten to smack them.
The effect of a violence threat will make them think I am a ‘Bad Boy’ causing them to want me, and then they too will submit to my plans as well.
Step 3) The men will then see that the hot Gringo is stealing all of the women and they will think it is because I speak English and have an American accent so they will then learn the true local lingo as well trying to win back there women.
With no effect I might add, you can’t fight what I have!
Positive Side effects equal - All of the younger people speak English and then teach there children and then they teach there children so that in just 2 generations I have had the effect that I was attempting to draw forth.
It might be 4 or 5 generations but we are still talking about the same amount of years though … they just reproduce faster then the normal Americans.
Another positive effect is after I run for President I will have all of the Hispanic woman in the ‘South’, or ‘Northern Cuba’ as some might call, it vote for me!
Now I will need a few things to get my mission up and going but I think if I pitch it the right way to Congress and the House that I might be able to get a grant to live and party in South Beach … yea this might work after all …
First - I will need a ‘Hoopty’.
Nothing special but something borderline classic with all the additions.
You know, hydraulics, 7-coat paint that changes in the light as you look at it, ground effects and a stereo and speaker set up that could kill people from the bass.
Second - I will need to go back old school to the 70’s and bust out the Pimp outfit.
That’s right, purple leisure suit with matching hat and a giant feather … anyone have some of the boots with fish swimming in the heels anymore?
Third - I might need a knife … nothing like Dundee had but something to show that I mean business … switchblade might work but I don’t want to seem to cocky with anything bigger.
Gun … no this is going to be friendly I hope …
Now I do foresee a few problems.
One, some of the gangs are going to be upset with me taking all of there women.
Luckily I studied martial arts for a summer and the military showed me how to be a ninja … sorta … not really but this is my story so shut up already!If they get to mouthy I’ll smack them too!
La Wife might disapprove and not like my mission, you know me having to be a stud and a borderline ‘Man Whore’ after all, but I have faith that she will be understanding that it is for the good of the Country!
Next, we have the problem of the music so I will need to get some GOOD ear protection.
I will have to learn how to dance too … that dance guys do during slow songs should work right?
The food also is an issue, I mean Flan is good but the rest of it ...
Then I will have the problem of all of the older woman who will long to be near me too.
I do have that effect on them too I fear so I must figure out how to take care of them without destroying my reputation … Dad what are you doing?
Wait, no you go to bed at like 6pm now so you can’t be my stand in with the geriatric side of all of this.
These people can’t be that bright, I mean they don’t even speak English so they should fall for this right?
I mean we took the country from another group who didn’t speak English and that turned out … ok but I think I stand a chance right?
I think this plan might need some more work but it is a start.
I do have that effect on them too I fear so I must figure out how to take care of them without destroying my reputation … Dad what are you doing?
Wait, no you go to bed at like 6pm now so you can’t be my stand in with the geriatric side of all of this.
These people can’t be that bright, I mean they don’t even speak English so they should fall for this right?
I mean we took the country from another group who didn’t speak English and that turned out … ok but I think I stand a chance right?
I think this plan might need some more work but it is a start.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
People are complaining so …
Now mind you it isn’t a lot of people but still enough of my reading audience … again not many people … that the point has now been made clear that not unlike myself, none of you have lives either and really do sit around waiting for the next Blog of a stranger in hopes of finding a glimmer of joy and amusement in the worlds of another.
So I figured, because I am a simple minded person after all … shut up you all you, you all are the people reading this after all so what does that say about you?
Back to my point that was lost because of your mean thoughts … being the simple person that I am (Stop Snickering!) I am going to go back to something I love to complain about myself.
What is that you might ask?
OK, ask already so we can all move on all right?
That's right, Catholics!
Now, some of you don’t know this but my father was raised Catholic … ok almost all of you know that because if you know me you know him but roll with me on this already please!
My first ‘real’ girlfriend was raised Catholic … and had just gotten out of a Catholic school when we first met … pardon me as I reminisce … (Phonics does not work on that word I might add!)
Now, we all have read … ok a lot … um some … well a few of us have read the New Testament … right?
There are things in there that Jesus says to do and not do.
Now Catholics say that Jesus is the Son of God and that his words are the end all, be all of things we should be following.
So, um, why do they not?
Today I will only hit on one topic because I want to back everything up with the books and versus so let’s start small shall we?
And call no man your father upon the earth: for one is your Father, which is in heaven … (Matthew 23:9)
This one seems basic doesn’t it?
I mean, ok we call our blood parent father, dad, old man, geezer, farticus and sometimes just to say hello … think about it that wasn’t that hard of a segue to jump with!
So, if it is so basic … why are the most of the leaders in the church called Father?
I mean I am not asking a hard question like … why do we still have children being rapped, or even so much as why if they have so many priceless items under the Vatican do they still need our money?
(That will be brought up at a latter date though I might add!)
So now I have written a page almost and asked a question … Yo, Pope can I get an answer … in English please my German is a little rusty!
Now mind you it isn’t a lot of people but still enough of my reading audience … again not many people … that the point has now been made clear that not unlike myself, none of you have lives either and really do sit around waiting for the next Blog of a stranger in hopes of finding a glimmer of joy and amusement in the worlds of another.
So I figured, because I am a simple minded person after all … shut up you all you, you all are the people reading this after all so what does that say about you?
Back to my point that was lost because of your mean thoughts … being the simple person that I am (Stop Snickering!) I am going to go back to something I love to complain about myself.
What is that you might ask?
OK, ask already so we can all move on all right?
That's right, Catholics!
Now, some of you don’t know this but my father was raised Catholic … ok almost all of you know that because if you know me you know him but roll with me on this already please!
My first ‘real’ girlfriend was raised Catholic … and had just gotten out of a Catholic school when we first met … pardon me as I reminisce … (Phonics does not work on that word I might add!)
Now, we all have read … ok a lot … um some … well a few of us have read the New Testament … right?
There are things in there that Jesus says to do and not do.
Now Catholics say that Jesus is the Son of God and that his words are the end all, be all of things we should be following.
So, um, why do they not?
Today I will only hit on one topic because I want to back everything up with the books and versus so let’s start small shall we?
And call no man your father upon the earth: for one is your Father, which is in heaven … (Matthew 23:9)
This one seems basic doesn’t it?
I mean, ok we call our blood parent father, dad, old man, geezer, farticus and sometimes just to say hello … think about it that wasn’t that hard of a segue to jump with!
So, if it is so basic … why are the most of the leaders in the church called Father?
I mean I am not asking a hard question like … why do we still have children being rapped, or even so much as why if they have so many priceless items under the Vatican do they still need our money?
(That will be brought up at a latter date though I might add!)
So now I have written a page almost and asked a question … Yo, Pope can I get an answer … in English please my German is a little rusty!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
