I used to think I was the man and could take on the world.
I then got out of shape and lower my standards to the realization that just about anyone could beat me up.
Now I have been exercising again and although still way out of shape, I am feeling the cocky drive coming forth once again.
To the guy’s out there they know what I am saying and this means, I think I can take on the world … that 24 year old muscle’y kid with a black belt around his waist is still a punk and I can smack him down with one good James Bond style Judo Chop!
I mean this is kinda what I think I look like ... in my head anyway ...
To the woman who read this they see a pathetic guy who they agree with because they know it helps me by stroking my ego in the hopes that I will not go home and cry myself to sleep from the pathetic wretch I have become … aka old age, fat and lazy!I studied martial arts off and on thought out my life … I was trained to be a killer by the Army and then also taught the ways of prison life survival as an officer … what does that mean in real life terms you might ask …
I know how to stand with pride and honor and prepare for the fight … OK it might need some work …
I know how to take a hit and my size, aka girth, means it’s harder to hurt me … so I can stand there and outlast the other guy … right?
I have learned that if things got out of hand … ok, more like when they get out of hand … I have a back up plan!
So, what does this do to my ego you might ask …
The truth is though, I can beat up anyone under the age of … 5 and possibly almost everyone ove the age of 75, unless they are Asian Monks … at that point I think I can take them once they hit the death bed right before the last breath … then again more then likely not being, they are Hard Core to the end … them and Chuck Norris …So watch out world, I am not down for the count yet!!!
2 comments:
Ohhh, you're so cute. I do have to say I'm not so positive about being able to take out the under five crowd. I mean, I think you could get some of them . . . but not all of them. I'm just sayin' . . .
Yahoozers!!!
You're not out of shape. Round is a shape.
Also, my money is on "La Wife" if the fight is on. She knows your weaknesses and won't fight fair. She'll say things that will hurt you and maim you and then where will you be? Duh....the same place you were when she said them. She can't lift you. You're too 'round'. Pay attention!!
Actually, she'll probably just leave, then you'll be alone and hungry almost immediately. Then what?
Hopefully ribs.
By the way...
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