New Site Up ... Sorta ...

Well, I have my new web site up and running.
It is basic to say the least ... deal with it and move on over to it.

WWW.DumbNameHere.Com

That's right, it is a major work in progress and will take a long time to get it to where I want it.
It is mine though and hopefully will turn into something of at least a 1/2 way respectable thing ... HAHA something related to me respectable ... other then La Wife that is!

I took the day off …

So, I being the smartest thing in the house at the moment … other then the dog … I working on building a website.
OMG, it used to be easy … now, not so much!
I just wanted to let everyone in on this.
Things I am trying to figure out:
1) How to sink the site and the name
2) How to add my Blog … and where to put it
3) How, and again where, to put my old Blog’s
4) How to link in my comic, and then again an archive of them too

I see why people get paid for this now.

Any volunteers?
I have a Shiny Quarter!!!

This sucks!I still have to do a Blog about my trip today too L

So let me tell you about …

Today I decided to call and verify everything for my upcoming trip to Atlanta.
I first called the car rental place, who told me all was in good order still.
I then called the hotel, who did not say the same thing.
The room I had I was informed, was not only not available … but did not exist!
What you might ask?
The manager told me that the resort did not have such a room and that his people made a mistake when reading me what kind of room it was.
This mad me sad … I love my friend and all, but I wanted separate rooms for a reason.
The manager told me he would look into helping me out and call a sister location to see if they had a room for me.
To his credit, he did call me back latter and told me he booked me at the other location and they where going to honor the price I was told form the get go.
Good guy, right?
He made me happy so yes, he is a good guy … in the mean time …
I, being a dork and having nothing better to do at work then personal things like look up hotels … used my handy dandy cell phone and to Hotels.Com I went!
I was searching around trying to find a place with less then a weeks notice on Labor Day weekend in a big city when it came to me.
That’s right my little murderers, I saw a ‘If you have questions please call!’ number.
So I did … I know I can write suspense novels … I am so darn good at this!
I spoke to a nice lady who commented how it was going to be difficult to find something like I Was looking for and even said I might have to change my perimeters.
She did not realize that I am pig headed and on a budget so this was more then likely not going to happen now did she?
Low and behold though, she found what I was looking for … 15 miles or so outside of Atlanta but come on, I need to give a little now don’t I?
So I am happy and we are chatting and I give all of my information and what happens next?
That’s right, my credit card is declined … no it wasn’t but do you see how I lead up to the big event and threw a twist in there …d arn I should SO be writing books … O, by the way, mine is dead in the water … I got about 4 chapters done and then, well, you all know me so I will not lie, I lost interest.
Back to the story you are all so riveted and held in suspense about.
She told me that as she was hitting the button it was slow and lagging and the room was booked out from under me.
This makes me sad … O such a sad panda … I know most of you will not get that reference but deal with it anyway.
She asks me if I can hold for a few moments as she looks into something for me.
I wait, and wait for what seemed like an hour or 3, but was in fact only 2 minutes or so when she comes back and says how sorry she is but that the room is gone.
She had spoken to her manager and asked if it was OK to give me another room that meet the standards I requested and she then said that it was actually in Atlanta.
Being that it was there fault for telling me I could have the other room she then also said that her manager told her it was Ok to charge me the rate from the other location.
That’s being said, I guess I should now tell you that I LOVE Hotels.Com and will sing it’s praises for as long as I remember … so about another 2 hours I am guessing …
Yours truly will be staying about a block away from where the convention is, so within walking distance, and in a two-room suite that has free parking for guests at the Hilton Suites on Peachtree.
That’s right my peeps, I feel like a Jefferson because I am moving up!
All joking aside, I have used Hotels.Com a few times before and have never had a problem with them.
Calling them though was just SWEET and supper helpful so if you need a place to look up places to stay, give them a try.
I wonder if I will see Paris?
I see London I see France I see Paris’s under … wait … she doesn’t where those …
No I will not show you the picture proof ... you all O me!
PS: It’s good to double check reservations … your tax dollars at work!

Wow, I did it …

That’s right!
I successfully succeeded in doing something I did not in fact want to do.
That’s right everyone, I went more then a week without writing to you all.
I know that you, my loyal readers, might be lost without my words and all I can say is that I am sorry.
I wish I would have not let my little flock down … no that’s not right … herd … gaggle … hum, no that not working either … O wait I have it!
My Murder!
Well now, that doesn’t sound so good either, but I like it anyway so deal with it!
Hehe bird brains hehe!

I wish I could give you all some great reason and explanation as to why I have not written, but I can’t.
Worse then that, I will not write next week either I fear.

Why you might ask?
Or even if you didn’t, you are still reading this so guess what … you will find out anyway!
I am being forced against my will to leave not only my lovely wife, dog and home, but I am also being dragged off to Atlanta GA.
O how I dislike that place!
Yes the Underground is kind of cool, and it is always fun to get yelled at when visiting the Varsity, but other then that … the place sucks!

My Old Army buddy, who still needs a name I might add, has decided we need to see each other more often.
That being it’s been like 4 years now and I guess it is about time.
He has also decided that Atlanta is about ½ way between both of us and that we needed to go to a convention together.
Yea, so what do I have to say about all of that?
4 DAYS AWAY FROM LA WIFE!!!
Wait, no it would be a lot more fun with her and I think I O her BIGTIME for her being so wonderful as to let me go do this without her.

So, that’s what’s going on.
I will write again before I go about a few other things my little murder’ers?

Sitting here wondering ...

What to write?
I am going through all of my old pictures on the computer, and found a new site to get some more, but nothing is jumping out at me.
I found 2 that I think are funny but I have to make some kind of jokes in regards to the Middle East and comment on there way of life and religion … wow, I think I can do that now don’t you?
Me having been there makes me the foremost leading expert in the field as far as I am concerned … as we all know, my Blog so move on if you don’t agree.
Speaking of that, why is it no one ever disagrees with my sentiments?
I can’t be right all of the time … well I can but I am trying to be modest here and find it difficult to grasp that the rest of the world has finally come around to my way of thinking.
That didn’t take as long as I thought it would to be honest …
While over there, I had a lot of time to think … Shut Up, MRE’s have strange effects …

While over there though, I saw a few things, that I might have commented on before but its time you all learned to deal with I only have a few things rattling around in my head, there for I will be forced to repeat myself regularly!
I saw poverty the likes no one should know, I saw kids with fully automatic rifles, I saw houses with only ½ the walls and or roofs as so they didn’t have to claim it as a house and be forced to pay taxes on them.
I saw starvation and hunger that was so bad even I was tempted to give my up my food … note I said that I was tempted … the right MRE’s are just to good to share!
I saw what a ‘War Torn Land’ is, and wish it a pone no ones people.
To boot, I saw more sand then you can comprehend … you think you can, but you can’t!
The point of this story is, and I am trying to get there as quickly as possible if you believe me or not, the whole time I was there I only saw one attractive woman.
Now as the months past I started noticing that some of them where not as ugly as when I first got there, but still only one attractive one that whole time.
She was our tour guide.
As her being the only woman worth a darn, and her perfect English, we spoke to her and found out a lot about her.
Strange things like, when she was a young teen the government took her away from her family and kept her under control by threatening to ‘hurt’ her family if she didn’t do what they told her to do, just because she was attractive.
She was sent to America to learn English and to learn things to talk to us about.
She was a government agent whose soul purpose was to keep our attention and make us feel more comfortable around her so we wouldn’t go wondering about.
The point, as I said I would get back to, was to point out that the following pictures I am going to show you are all about.
They say that they keep there woman covered as so that temptation is avoided … I, and everyone else who was over there with me thinks it is more because these people are UGLY!
That’s right, I said it, they covered there woman because they where embarrassed of them!
Then we have this one, in my eyes it is just disappointment for both sides, as from what I saw anyway!

That’s about it, this was just a quick post to remind you all I still write … and most of us don’t know how good we truly have it!
On a side note, I have a friend/co-worker who each of his children he sent to different 3rd world countries when they turned 15 to see how good it is in America.
It’s funny every time I hear about it, and I think a real eye opener.
Talk to you all again sooner or latter … hopefully I will have a good subject/topic here soon?

The Good Life …

I am sitting here writing, well typing but lets not get to technical, while La Wife is off cooking brunch and cleaning the kitchen.
It’s good to be a man!
… Before one of you says it, yes I do long to be one someday!
I was looking around and started to think, wow, I have it good!

I have La Wife, and Wonder Dog!
I not only have a job, I have one that is not only good, but also enjoyable … Injoyable, yea that’s better …
I not only have a place to sleep, but it isn’t to bad of a place to boot.
I have friends and family, who not only acknowledge me in public but also say nice things about me sometimes when I am not around.
I have, with La Wife’s assistance, all of these things and 2 working vehicles.
That not only run and have radio’s, but also both have A/C!
I have insurance, a retirement, a small pension from the Army and get to take a vacation once a year … one way or another MUHAHA!
I even have alone time whenever I want it, God I have it good!

So what do I have to complain about you might ask?
Well let me tell you … yea, I got nothing of any substantial value so lets move on shall we?

I, like so many others have traveled around outside the US once or twice now.
I have been all over the Caribbean, Mexico and the Middle East.
I did have lay over stays in Paris and Ireland but I never really got to see the country L
I have scene how bad it can be, not the worst out there but enough to make me see how good it is here in the US.
In this way I can, again, say I am a blessed man.

I listen to people every day complain about how bad the Government is and how much better it is in other places.
Everyone says that Florida doesn’t have a clue how to run things … let me tell you about the Middle East … wow you all have no clue!
I hear how it is so much better up North, then go back and try and survive on your petty retirement already … O wait, you can’t because you all forget how much cost of living is and that’s why you move down here … also the COLD!
Shut up or go home already, but, if nothing else, STOP voting in my elections!
I shouldn’t say so much on that one, I don’t vote …
Also, if it is so great in Canada and Europe with the free medical care … GO ALREADY!!!
Yes, we are working toward a Government Medical Aid, sorry people, we NEED it so shut up already!
Stop looking at the now and look toward the near future.
Yes, we will spend a lot of money out the door but over time if people go in and get that anti-inflammatory pill now for $25 we don’t have to pay for the Appendectomy in a year for a few thousand bucks instead.
Also, the person will only be out of work for an afternoon instead of a week or so!
So many people are saying that it isn’t fair for us to be paying for others health care … WHAT?
What do you all think Medicare and Government Health Clinics are doing?
Florida has a program that helps kids with out insurance from low-income homes already. Hospitals take people without insurance, and end up eating the bill now when people don’t pay the bills.
So, please tell me what is so wrong with this?
It’s making it more like a Socialist network?
When did Canada and England go Socialist?
I SO did not get that memo … is that what the Boston Tea Party was really all about?
Yes, as I said out the door it will be very costly, but, don’t we already have people all over who don’t have insurance?
People who live with pain every day forcing themselves to go to work to take care of there families and putting there own health at risk for the betterment of there family!
I know a guy who instead of paying for health insurance for himself paid for life insurance because he knew he was going to drop sooner or latter and only hoped in the end he would be able to help his family financially … THAT’S NOT RIGHT PEOPLE!

Everyone is getting so upset with this subject, myself included now that I read over this a little, but why are we so upset with this when we have so many other problems?
Anyone look at the other bills they are trying to ass?
Or how Senators will not sign a Bill unless it has an additional 1.2 million dollars piggy backed onto it so he can have a few more state parks in his State and have the water front docks restored?
Things need to be lobbied for, but wow, COME ON ALREADY!!!
Hea, that’s a good thing to do, but, how about we figure out a way for you’re people to make that happen and stop taking away from my federal government money, that you all love spending so much … and then say we don’t have any!
How many trillions now are we in dept?
How much of the country now belongs to over seas organizations?

I am starting to rant, time to move on …

I disagree with the President on a few items but not so much this one.
Does it need work, yea, but I have faith that it will not matter in the end, being that the world is going to be destroyed in 2012.
Speaking of the President, let me point out something to all of you!
If he could not produce a birth certificate and prove he was born in the US, and or on a US recognized property, don’t you think that THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN FOUND OUT BY HIS APPONENTS IN THE ELECTIONS???

How stupid are people … wait, never mind … moving on … Grr …

A quick thanks …

I would like to say a quick thank you to all of the people who came over yesterday.
That being said, there it was and I hope it was as good for you as it was for me.
The thank you that is, and not so much the visit.
We laughed, eat, exchanged stupid stories and played video games.
Yep, what else do you need to equal a good time?
I mean, video games make everything better … just like bacon!
Wow bacon is good!
La Wife and I, and even a few coworkers, have sat around trying to think of things that aren’t better with bacon.
We have only been able to come up with a few things and mostly they where deserts … and yes some deserts have been declared that they could be better with bacon.
Speaking of bacon, that makes me think of Kevin Bacon, leading me to think about his ugly wife on the Closer, and how every time I see that show it reminds me of Paula Dean, and that makes me change the channel as quickly as I can.
Yeppers changing channels is the new point (Come on we talked about this yesterday people) I was going for and how everyone commented about how my brain works and how it goes in some strange direction that leads to some strange point that no one was expecting.
Does that make me kind of like M. Night Shyamalan in my little Bloguverse?

(Section #2 Happy?)
Back to the opening line, and subject title too I guess?
La Wife, Wonder Dog and I had a blast yesterday and other then spending hours between both cooking and cleaning we think it was worth it.
We where reminded of how some of us used to meet up every month for dinner …
We think we used to do something like that, memories fade with time and that might have been something we saw on TV or something?
It does remind me that every time we get together we all seem to have a good time, it is probably because we never see each other that is making it that way though?
My Army Buddy, who still needs a nick name, and I see each other every couple of years and only talk on the phone possibly every other month, and that seems to work well.
You know, absence makes the heart grow fonder or something … to much of a good thing can be a bad thing … some other cliché about something or other.
So, the long and short is, everyone has scene our place now so shut up and move on to something new to complain about.Also, let us know when we are doing it again!

I got nothing …

I think that that covers it doesn’t it?
Wait, wow, for once Word didn’t try and tell me not to use that and that back to back with each other!
Could it be that my computer is finally learning that I do things because I want to, no matter how wrong they might be?
Could it be that my computer is in fact learning … DEAR GOD ITS SKYNET!!!
Wow, my computer can learn but my dog still only knows 2 tricks … this is wrong!
Now, I wouldn’t mind if my I-Phone learned a few more new tricks.
I actually encourage it, with the lovely applications that I can download onto it.
I hate saying it, but I will because once again this is my Blog and you all can’t stop me, I am actually turning into a Mac guy because of my I-Phone.
I have an article on how to turn a normal PC into a Mac operating system and I am thinking that I might need to do that.
Then, my Phone and my PC will be true friends … wait, do I Want my computer and phone to hook up and be friends?
What will be next?
Midnight conversations about me?
Unwanted file swapping?
Out of network communications to other servers?
OMG IT IS THE START OF SKYNET!!!

Well, I guess I will just have to take my chances against the Governor of California because I am not giving either of them up.
Do you hear me Mr. ”Save the Seals”?
I know what you are all about, traveling back in time to try and convince us that you are a good person so when your armored clones show up asking if they can use the phone we will let them into our houses so they can kill us all off!
Sara, you tried to warn us but we never listened, we will be, and I am, sorry!
I am still not giving up my phone … I will just have to go hang out with Tom Cruise and Will Smith in the under ground bunker they have built.

Darn technology, I didn’t realize I needed it as bad as I do until TEVO.
Well I guess Cars and A/C are big too but lets be realistic.
We all finally opened our eyes after TEVO came out and we all found out that we where addicted to technology.
So let me begin …

Hello, my name is John, and I am addicted to technology.
I know that Skynet is coming and I am not so sure it doesn’t have the right ideal about us.So much so that if given the option, I will probably side with it as long as it lets me keep my TEVO and I-Phone … Wonder Dog would be great too … and La Wife might be a nice bonus, but I understand the fear of repopulation and I don’t want to push my luck, so, if I have to ditch her for the Wonder Dog I understand and it’s all good.

What to say …

I am sitting here trying to think of something to write about, and to say that I am coming up short is a real understatement.
I read about a competition the other day where people try and write a really long sentence using every type of punctuation, and as much fun as that sounds, I don’t think it is really my thing.
You know, because I have a wife who can do it better, and I don’t want to embarrass myself in trying!
I read about another world’s largest thing, it was a cupcake.
It was 15 pounds of fudge and 60 pounds of icing.
Wow!
It’s at the Mall of America … I think I would like to go there.
The problem is that once there we might see everything in the world that we want and not be able to get it because we spent all of our money on the rides in the mall.
We could just go to the flea market and ride the rides there and get just about anything we want there too.
Of course if we are going to go to a flea market we should go to the one in Webster, they do have everything ... Like this!

Then we could eat at that country restaurant, or the all you can eat fried chicken place.
I grew up in a place that hade a nice chicken place, but now it is closed because the new managers sucked.
Speaking about things that suck, La Wife and I each as children went to a place and remember loving it, now it sucks too, so that makes us sad.
Now that I am thinking about sad things I remember all of the dogs I have had over the years and miss them.
Dogs are good because they are loyal and like you for no other reason then you are you.
I heard once a person say that they only hope that they can someday be the person that their dog thinks they are.
I like that saying.
Other things I like … PIZZA!
We had some last night but it wasn’t so good.
We will probably go to Kissimmee to a whole in the wall place we know to grab a slice latter today while we run errands, just because.
You know that fraise had to come from somewhere (Run Errands) and it makes me wonder if back in the day it was as simple as people literally ran around doing errands?
No wonder the bike was such a big deal back there.
First the bike, then the little basket!
Can you picture Kevin Bacon doing the movie Quicksilver with a basket on the front of his delivery bike?
You know, Quick Silver is also a character in the Marvel universe (AKA Bad Guy to the X-Men and son of Magneto)
He has the power to run supper fast, a lot like the Flash … that was a short lived show in the early 90’s that I kind of liked.
It was not cost efficient they said so they canceled it.
They just canceled a bunch of shows, one was Pushing Daisies, La Wife enjoyed that one, and it was only in it’s second season and had already won an Emmy.
Now that I have brought up enjoyment’s … that seems to me like it should start with IN instead of EN.
Simply because it makes more since to me that way, as if, you are IN Joy’ing something.
Because we have covered IN-Joying things, this was a stupid Blog and I am wondering if anyone has even finished reading it this far?
Reading is good though, especially when you are curled up on the bed reading silly things like the world’s largest cupcake, or a diary entry about your younger years.
Laying next to that person who you hope to go traveling with to places like the Mall of America, the flee market, that little pizza place or just some other place you used to eat in at some other town … and of course your dog!
Remember the good times for what they where, and not what they have became.
Don’t forget the little things in the world that make you happy.
IN-Joy what you have, but still look forward to the future.
Keeping going toward those future happy moments and memories.

PS: I need to find more clip art pictures to post L

Things on my mind …

I haven’t posted in over a week.
… La Wife says she can’t believe that I didn’t post about July 4th!
I know I said I would try and not do that, but, I did and you all either have to deal with it and move on … or, deal with it and move on!
So, why not tell you all why I have been slacking?
I am finding out more and more about things my X-boss has said to people and things are starting to come clear as to why so many people stopped talking to me … he lied, a lot.
I am dealing with some medical stuff like so many others of you out there and trying to figure out just how good and or bad of an ideal exploratory surgery is.
I just found out that a story that I have told for over a decade, and that changed my life (I thought), has in fact turned out to be a giant lie that no one can figure out.
I don’t want to tell you what it was or anything about it … I know isn’t that nice?
I never told you the story so it isn’t like you all have missed anything right?
Don’t even start with that it wouldn’t have mattered if I hadn’t just told you all that something was wrong.
Yea, I am typing this out with an evil smirk on my face.
I think you all should also know that this is the first time, in a while, that I almost feel like myself since I found out, so it sucks to be you all, but, at least you can all feel better in knowing the fact that you are helping in my healing.
I have also realized that I have a weird collection of people in my life.
I know, where did that just come from?
Let’s start this off with it is all my fault and I take all the blame … now read on and feel bad about yourselves as needed.
I have segregated myself that is for sure.
I am a recluse and a hermit and am happy being that.
Shut up I know I have issues and know it doesn’t make since.
That being said …
My father and I talk about once a week or so.
It is almost always pleasant and I can’t remember the last time we have had a fight … wow, darn dad you are working harder at this then I give you credit for aren’t you!
My Mom and I talk, well when not busy in life, about once a week also.
The last time we had a fight was on a cruise … it’s strange the things I can remember … but that was solved somehow with people dropping it and notes being passed under doors.
My Sister and I talk, well, to say every few months is almost putting it nicely.
When we do, we laugh and have a good time and then I ponder why we don’t more often.
Well, raising 3 little … La Bandito’s keeps her way busy?
Is that right?
I doubt it … any how, She lives a fast life and has forsaken her only sibling.
(Insert Guilt here)
It’s my fault on that one too though I guess, I am invited to things but they are so far away and last minute (That one is your fault sis :P)
My Brother-In-Law, we have fun when together but he is always on the run working and also helping to raise the 3 La Bandito’s.
Has anyone else caught on that I use my Spanish just, well wrong?
Let’s see, my Dad’s step kids, well we meet so late in life that we don’t talk.
My Stepfather, well, he calls about once a week and is an all right guy.
He is a good guy and fun to be around … needs to buy me something nice to refresh my liking of him though … my love can only be bought after all.
My Stepmother is all right too.
Nice and pleasant and to good for my old man.
She makes him happy though and that’s good enough for me.
Lets see, In-Laws!
I see them more then my own family.
They are cool and invite us to do stuff all of the time, La Wife drags me off and, well that’s about it … I go.
I have nothing bad to say about them, but just to upset La Wife I will also not say anything nice about them … or her for that matter …
Although a lot can be said in that category, they are good people after all.
K, so where am I going with this you ask?
Other then La Wife and the above mentioned people, I have nobody.
Go ahead and say my old Army buddy who still needs a nickname …
He and I talk once a month or so, and that’s about it.
We have a blast and will drop an hour talking like schoolgirls but then nothing again till the next time.
O yea the point, I don’t really have one other then the people I know and hang around with is a small circle or people I find worth my time.
Thanks for being part of it and I will not bad mouth you all anymore then is necessary and once it is no longer entertaining I know I should stop then too!
Now, for the bad part of this … Ying and Yang people … something has changed and I am rather upset no one noticed
I have scene my mother, father, mother-in-law and father-in-law … even a sister-in-law now that I think about it.
My In-Laws noticed though … remember the good people comment mentioned above.
All of you saw me!
The only thing in regards to the subject I am about to talk about is my sister!
O’yea, now it all makes since doesn’t it!
You regret it already and are trying to think how you can get yourselves out of this situation and let me tell you now, you can’t!
La Wife and I sat down to have a quick dinner with my Mother and Father-in-law and they bring up my sister and look me over completely … that’s right, you 2 are getting the blame!
Because although my Father was a detective, we don’t expect a lot of observation skills from him when he is recovering from knee surgery.
My EVIL Mother and Father-in-law made a point to say that … hum … she needs a nick name too now if I am going to bring her up now doesn’t she … Chico for now will work I guess … But that Chico has been going to the gym and is looking great and then about how wonderful and great she is.
How she is a beacon of light in this horrible world and they are just proud that they can claim her in there lives for without her there can be no light, or something like that I didn’t pay attention because lets face it, they think highly of everyone … it’s an old person thing I guess … if I keep this up I think I am going to be written out of the wills so I guess I need to drop this one and quickly …
To the point though, wow, I am rambling but I have to make up for not posting last week.
I had, at that time, lost almost 60 pounds also.
I guess this proves that everyone else see me the same way that I see my self, a fat butt!
La Wife says I am a fool but how can the people closest to me not have noticed?
It is to late now to say anything and anything you will say will just be considered a back peddling of sorts so don’t even bother
So, thank you for either proving me right to La Wife, or making me feel like you all care when in fact you don’t.
Yea, I think that works.
Chico, you have one chance to be the best family member in my book.
That’s if you say anything the next time you see me … then again who knows when that might be?
Well, I am back to feeling bad again so thanks for helping me revert back to the pain and suffering that keeps me going.
Ying and Yang …
And I wonder why the doctor keeps asking me if I am depressed … and the lady at the ammo store …

PS – Buzz is doing fine.
He is flying around with his friends and doing his own thing … he does stay behind some times all by himself but I think that’s just because his wing might hurt to bad to fly as far as the others … or, he smells bad and they don’t want him around?

A Strange Phone Call …

So, about a month or two, or even more (I am not so sure because I and didn’t really care to be honest, I got a strange phone call.
It went something like this:
Me – Hello
Them – Hello, is this John (Last name blanked out as to protect the innocent)
Me – Yes (Insert reaching for the hang up button)
Them – Where you by chance married to a Jennifer (Last name left out as to show no ties toward her in an attempt to forget that part of my life, and to keep her bill collecting agencies off my tail …)
Me – (Insert WTF thoughts) Yes, I was … (She must be dead, I can have my dog back!)
Them – Hi, do you have a minute or two so that I can talk to you, I am her soon to be X-mother-in-law?
Me – (Thoughts of I guess this means she isn’t dead, and I am not getting my old dog back) Sure, what’s up?

Long story short, this woman tells me that Jen is married, still playing Every Quest on an upwards of 8+ hours a day.
They have 2 children, loosing another during a pregnancy.
Is on all kinds of medications and still doesn’t have a job.
Causing her to gain even more weight, and calling for her to take more drugs for depression.
She has also cheated on her husband and left him taking the children.
The worst thing I found out though was, that there youngest child was allergic to Dogs and they gave away my dog to some stranger’s … yea, not so happy about this one.
Considering one of the agreements was that if anything ever came up I got her back!
I was also informed that I was abusive, and controlling.
Not letting her leave the house, or ever see her friends and family.
Saying that she finally ran away one day when I left for work … yeppers, wow I was a jerk, I would have left me too!

I get asked all kinds of strange questions like if I have heard form her or know where she is … and of course I say no because why in the world would she contact me, I’m the abusive & controlling X?

So then this strange woman asks if I will write up a letter saying how she acted and what brought our relationship to an end, as in regards to the amount of time she devoted to Ever Quest.

The phone call ends and I sit on this for a few hours and when La Wife comes home sees something is wrong and I tell her all about it.
I few hours latter I decided to call the X and tell her about this strange phone call I got …

She informed me that she was on the ‘lamb’ per say because it was in fact her husband who was cheating and threatening her.
I asked about the dog and was informed that she had forgotten … big surprise right?
I then asked about me being controlling, she said I was always trying to make her go to work and never letting her just play Ever Quest … yeppers that’s the same as never letting her leave the house right?
I asked when I was physically abusive to her … yea, she said one time I was very upset and grabbed her and threw her into a hallway door, but that she deserved it … when did I have a place with a hallway with a closet door in it?

I think you get the jest of this … yea this was a weird day in my little world for sure!

I sent them both an E-mail saying thanks for the memories but I would not get involved.
I have been out of the loop for about 7 years and I cannot speak for her as it has been so long … and to leave me alone!

So that’s about it, I wonder how many people she told these things to, and I think I now know why her parents hated me so much.
You people that knew her, and about those times, feel free to post your thoughts and if you think any of what she said was true … or even contradictions to it … you know like I took the keys to her truck and wouldn’t let her drive to work or anything … and how I kept everything of hers refusing to give it back.

For those of you who don’t know, I packed it all up and boxed it for her leaving it in the living room so she could just come in and take it all … she left all kinds of stuff that I latter mailed to her at the cost of a pretty penny or two.
The best part of all of this is … still not the strangest phone call I have received!

Not so proud of this ...

Some times I sit around thinking ‘What is funny?’
As a guy, I know one thing that always makes other guys laugh … that’s right … potty humor … sucks to be the rest of you!
I don’t normally do things like this, so, sit back and enjoy … or move on and be quiet!

The whole reason I am writing and showing the rest of this is for this one picture.
I was at Wally-World with La Wife and low and behold I say this.You see pictures like this all over the web but this is the first time I saw something like this and just had to share … the rest is just fluff that I figured I would throw along with it … themes are good, right?

O come on, Skid resistant!
Thats funny people!!!

In the Army this is the norm, OK not so much but ... thats right, a stupid Thinking Man joke ...


Always an inportant thing to keep in the back of your mind ...

What happens when you realize you parked to far away, and the nearist place to go is 5 miles away ...

For when you are on the move ...

Then, after you are done moving!

When you first realize that she might not be the one ...


Now you know why the Cops didn't drink Coffee that day ...

... and what the female officers did the next day ...

Thats it, sorry but some times things like this just HAVE to be done!

Because it was asked …

At least one of you has asked about Buzz.
OK, so only one of you has in fact asked about Buzz.
So here it is, birds, I think, enjoy flying and being free.
I think I would if I was a bird for a day … then again they more then likely think that having thumbs is a good thing and we don’t even take note of them because they are what they are and we are so used to having them.
What would a dog do if it had thumbs for a day?
Open all of the cabinets and get all of the food, then let it’s self out to run around the neighborhood for hours and hours.
That’s what a dog would do … at least Wonder Dog would!
Most of the other wildlife around here would freak out!
I mean, what would a rabbit or a blue jay do with thumbs?
Speaking of other animals, I have scene a bunch of cardinals and blue jays this year.
Also, raccoons, rabbits, owl’s and a falcon/hawk this week so it has been a good week to go walking with Wonder Dog this week.
Mind you, Wonder Dog hasn’t scene any of them.
Not even the butterfly that landed on her head … she is so the most broken hound doggy!
Well, now that we think about this they did have the mouse with a human ear attached to it’s back.
It looked strange so I am sure thumbs would be very out of place, right?
Monkeys have thumbs … we know that they do!
You know, all the same things a little kid does … hehe
Although monkeys do know how to use there most blessed thumbs for fighting.
Saw a video on that and it was not pretty!
Plus the crazed monkeys are so darn strong!
Speaking of strong creatures with thumbs, I was watching the cartoon Batman and he was fighting a gorilla that was smarted then most humans able to speak and made machines and things.
Now, I do love me some Batman and will put him against any other hero but come on, if a gorilla was to hit him in the head, it would be over!
I, like Batman, am a near perfect specimen of human evolution and pride my knowledge, again like Batman, in my investigation skills and martial arts prowess (HAHA!)
I though, know my limitations and I think that even though I could take out Superman and O so many other super heroes, not just because I know there secrets and would take full advantage of them but also I am just that good, all at the same time know that if a gorilla was to hit me in the head that the fight would not only be over but my secret identity would never be figured out … because my face would be completely demolished including my teeth … also my fingertips would be mysteriously cloaked … yea, that would be my lame power wouldn’t it?
“Hum, we can’t ID him because his fingerprints are blank?”
Yea, I can’t get a cool utility belt, a nifty mask that hides my face, a ring that does … well anything or some cool power to help me fight crime.
Nope I would end up with unidentifiable fingerprints.
This brings up a good point though, what super power would I want?
Flight – That would make travel easy for sure … my luck though I would be able to fly but only at like ½ a normal walking speed.
Super Strength – That for me would be more like I can never turn it off, so if I pick anything up it breaks.
Perfect Health - I already have the super human physical form …
Never Aging – Yea, I would be an infant forever … not working either!
A Cool Magical Item – It would have a draw back like I could only use it every other blue moon or something like that.
A Cool Side Kick – Nope, he would be cooler then me and I would surly turn into the side kick blunder … did you all know that in the current comics Bruce Wayne is dead and that the original Robin, Dick Grayson, has now taken over? Did you all know that there were multiple Robins? One was killed by the Joker (Voted by the people I might add), one was a girl and one was his son … see you all are such losers for not knowing all of this … or am I for knowing it and not reading the comic …
Infra Vision – I live in Florida, everything is hot so that power would suck too. Super Speed – Now that could be cool … but then I would end up with pansy skin and have blisters all the time and would only be able to use my powers for like 10 seconds every other week.
Metal Bones like Wolverine – No, then I would become a hydrophobic.
Mental Powers! – (I mean other then my super intelligent mind now) Hum, able to read minds … I would end up only being able to speak to things like amebas … yea that would be a quick and intelligent conversation “I Live! I eat! I get Sleepy! I die! Next … I Live …”. Then again I could end up with Telekinesis! Then I would just loose my Atlas like body because I would never have to move to do anything. I would need a side kick with super strength to wheel me out to help fight monsters and bad guys. I would be Wheel Barrel Man!
You know, the mind is a strange things … I can’t remember so many things but I remember my sister as a teen’ish writing a story about an ameba that lived in a glass of milk next to her bed … yea that’s how I work people so deal with it and move on already.
Let’s see, O yea, Buzz!
He has been spotted flying short bursts and looks like he might make a full recovery, we are hoping anyway.
He is also living now in a place we call the ‘swill’ room.
It is were we take all the nasty uneaten food and stuff at the end of the day.
It seems to make him happy so we aren’t saying anything about it … that and because it is funny when the inmates keep sending the new guy to open the door and a screaming buzzard starts yelling at them … yea, it’s the little things in the world that make day to day life worth living.
You know, like my Blog!

What’s that Buzz …

I figured that our buzzard friend needed a name.
So, me being of great imagination, I decided to name him Buzz!
Some of you might think after the great first (Fake) man to walk on the moon, but in fact it was because it is the short name version of what he is.
He was atop his little perch once again today.
All alone I might add … and I called La Wife to tell her about him.
She decided I needed to help him out and call animal control or something.
So, I did.
Animal control shows up … Buzz decided to finally move for the first time in a week.
Go figure?
So the trapper and I got to talk and he told me that even if he would have been on his perch in the mid-sky he could not in fact capture him.
That would be my job?
He informed me that I should get a net or a tarp and after I catch him that he would then come back and take him away.
To kill him!
So, I thought long and hard about this and decided.
Buzz, although he might be in pain and missing his friends, is at least close to his friends and getting food.
We think that his wing is working better because he is gliding a little now and then off of his little tower.
I told the nice man who kills things for a living he could go and that we would wait for nature to do what ever it feels is best.
So, much to so many of you alls disapproval, I will not be chasing Buzz with a net or tarp … although I have been thinking about getting a net gun for when ever Wonder Dog escapes …
We can only hope that he gets to feeling better so he can rejoin his ‘friends’ eating the nasty unwanted food of our lands and looking as ugly as ever … or at least die far away so I don’t know what happened to him and can picture him flying around … and so I don’t have to see his friends eating him, yea that would be disturbing!
Cannibalism is cool and don’t think if it comes down to it I am not going to cook a persons leg on a spit, (Would that be dark or light meat?) but I don’t really want to see it with a creature I have now named.

Watching a bird …

Well, once again today I found myself walking around looking at things and thinking about other things.
Wow my job is mind numbing at times!
Then I looked up and saw a bird.
Not just any bird but a turkey buzzard.
Yea, not much of a bird but still a bird none the less and that is the point to this story.
It was sitting up on top of a low tower that it had … wait lets go back a step …
About a week ago we noticed this ugly creature and saw that it was hopping around all over the place with one wing cocked off to its side.
We deduced, because we had nothing better to do that day either, that it had broken its wing in some way.

So now, once again I see the bird and it is now sitting all by it’s self at the top of a short tower that it had hopped up the stairs of to reach.

About 50 feet away stood a water tower that just a week before it would have been sitting with all of it’s ‘friends’ much higher in the air.

(The other buzzards hang out on the rafters on this bigger tower)

It accrued to me then, this guy is all alone, hurt, scared, hungry and sad.
Can a buzzard can be sad?
Why not?
So I started thinking.
This poor guy not only can’t fly but he can’t even get to perch with his friends … who will eat him the second he dies …
He is just trying to get as close to his old ‘home’, and just can’t make it.
This some how bothered me and almost made me think I had feelings.
This made me think of a few movies …
I Robot, were at the end all of the old robots are huddled together in the trailers.
City of Angels, when at the end the fallen angel goes to where he knows his old friends are even though he can’t see them.
The Next Karate Kid, as they try and nourish the hawk back to health.
All of this led me to realize a few things.
1) I have watched a lot of bad movies
2) I feel a lot like this bird!
Just like this guy though, at the end of the day when I am in need of help how many of my ‘friends’ will show up to help me or leave me alone to starve and die all by myself.
Then eat me …
Then after I do kick the proverbial bucket they would all then act like they did care, and say how they did everything they could but it just wasn’t enough … hypocrites and liars!
Just like so many church going folk I might add!

Just so you know, we tried feeding the bird but it ran away from us.
What do you expect from a creature hated, hurt and afraid …

This Blog really doesn’t have much of a point.
It’s just been over a week and this is what is on my mind today, so I am sharing.
Just like they told me I should do in school to make friends … I hope they don’t eat me!

Just like my littlest niece said … I am not a cookie!

Company …

So last night we had some company come over to play cards.
Once again it turned into an all night thing with 3 of them leaving around 3am and one crashing out on our sofa.
We smiled and laughed barely missing food and or liquid coming out of our face holes from well timed jokes.
It popped into my head last night how strange it is to see how people know each other.
Who would have thought that a collage kid, a out of work computer tech, a medical records clerk, a security guard, a person between jobs and a yellow pages add sales men could all end up meeting let alone having such a fun time?
None of us went to school together and most of us didn’t even grow up here.
None of us work together and only 2 of us were related, well 3 of us now I guess … against my better judgment I might add!
I forget sometimes how hard it is to meet new people and even harder sometimes as to why we do … or even why we put up with some of the others we already have …
Then nights like last night come around and remind me.
I can say though that I only have 2 friends … yea isn’t that sad … not to me!
I have many, many acquaintances, but I only have 2 friends
All though they are just as close, if not closer in some ways, then my family.
They are of course, La Wife (I know she is family but deal with it) and … hum I need a nick name for him don’t I …
What should I call him … hum this is kid of hard!
NO, he is NOT imaginary!
Maybe I ought to do a poll and voting to see what everyone else thinks I should call him?
Until then …
You all know who he is though, ________ and he is just a good guy who for some reason likes me and to be honest I just don’t know why.
La Wife is also just a wonderful person … she could do better and needs to run before I ruin her life anymore but for some reason she thinks I am OK and it might work out … I never said she was bright …
She and He are people I know I can call at anytime and they will do anything for me.
I hope they know I will do the same for them also!
So, all I am saying is, thanks for the people who choose to be I my life.
Yep that’s it, sorry for a letdown but this is all you are getting today.That and Sax’s comedy club is fun and you should go … and take me when you do!

Memorial Day, Once Again …

Last year I wrote about our Fallen Veterans, the things they have done and given up for our freedoms in this Great Nation of ours.
People, I think anyway, take these gifts for granted.
When we say we have freedom, we do not have absolute freedom, having some things that we can’t do.
We also have Big Brother always looking over our shoulder in ways I think are violations of the Constitution …
People complain that we don’t have about freedom and that in fact we have very little.
No, we have just gotten greedy and think that we deserve more … Ok I agree in more then a few ways … but I think it is because so many haven’t traveled the world and scene first hand how much we have, and how little the others do.
People forget that our allotment of freedom includes things like me being able to write this Blog and others to read it.
There are places in the world still were they are not allowed to speak in public, read anything … even learn how to read for that matter, and so many other things that we TRULY take for granted
We have all heard about book burnings in other countries.
What about all of the Slave trading still going on all around the world.
Then also we have all the religion being taken away from the people, and then people killed because they are of a different faction of the same religion.
Can you imagine if that was to happen here?
Baptists against Southern Baptists … hum … isn’t that one of the ways that Jesus got so popular after his death and got his faith so popular … gotta love Catholics …
Back to a point … so many people remember the Fallen Veterans, as they should today, because they did so much, but …
Today is all about the memory of the people who died in the military fighting all around the world and even state side for our protection and freedoms.
This day was originally called Decoration Day, and was to pay respect to the Union soldiers after the Civil War… I guess the Yanks might have gotten something right?
Then after World War I they decided to include all military from any conflict.
I am thinking about going into another direction though … yea, trying to be respectful today so keep you mind in check will ya …
How about the people in America who have died in the effects to keep America safe, from both others and ourselves?
We, in my opinion, need to pay respect to people like Fire Fighters, the Law Enforcement and of course, one of the most under rated and best/worst professions in America … Correctional Enforcement work.
We have our soldiers and I will never take anything away from them.
What about our Fire Fighters, referred to as Professional Hero’s.
They daily offer their lives up for people they don’t know and only hope to help others.
The Police Officers who at a moments notice can find themselves in a gun fight from something as small as pulling someone over for a traffic violation going bad.
Of course the Department of Corrections, ALL employee’s not just Security personal, who are forced to work with the people that we have declared the scum of society and don’t want to be around anymore known for murder, battery on other things even worse the rap.
We should also throw in Paramedics into this.
They don’t go running into fires as often as Fire Fighters but they do find them selves in some crazy situations that can be just as bad.
Then again we also have he people state side who most of us dislike most of the time and bad mouth on more then one occasion … Politicians.
I mean we all remember the original Politicians who decided to not only break away from England because they thought it was the right thing to do, but also thought enough to come up with an ideal and dreams of what they wanted and what we needed.
Now and days though, they have to be the people who make laws that need to be made knowing that they will be disliked for there decisions.
How would you like to be forced to decided what is good for the mass when the minority sometimes gets looked over … yea … that’s got to suck!
Now that is of course the minority of Politicians as we all know, but they do have some who are not completely corrupted … I think …
I wanted to make some big long Blog about that was moving and heart lifting … I did that last year and don’t think I can do it again to myself let alone everyone else.
You should know how I feel and if not reread last years Memorial Day and Veterans Day Blog’s.
We need to pay tribute to our military personal for sure.
We should pay respect to our fallen brothers and sister who have kept us safe.
We also need to remember that the people who stay state side, and live dangerous lives so that we can live the life we live, need to be respected also.
These people, and so many others who will stand up next to them also, are one of the reasons why America will stay standing as the Last and Most Powerful Super Power in the world.
They say that China has never truly been concurred.
They have changed leadership more then a few times, but they have not been forced to change their faith, language or general way of life.
I am proud to say though, that if anyone was to try and take over America they would not just fail, but the repercussions a pone them would be a show to make it known never to even think about doing something so stupid ever again … to them and any other …
I know that I, and everyone I know, would stand up and fight along side each other.
I know that prisoners would come out of the prisons and fight because of the love they have for this land and the people they care about who might loose their freedom.
Wouldn’t that be a scary sight … they would, I am sure, do wonders for the cause but the clean up afterward and getting them back might be difficult.
Think about how this country stood together after the Twin towers … God have mercy on the fools who wish to have that bonded combination of fear and anger turned against them as we as a Nation stand up and fight back.
Terrorists know that they only way they can hurt us is by doing cowardly single attacks because they can not, I will repeat this again, CAN NOT take us on our own land!
We will stand together even tighter, putting Race and Religion aside, even putting Gang colors and dislikes aside.
I have faith that we will not only stand up together so much more then just to defeat the invaders, but to also destroy anyone attempting to hurt our home.
Now if we can just figure out a way to get this bond during the rest of the time …
Back to the point though … thank you my brothers and sisters.
Those who have, do and will do what needs to be done when it needs to be done.
This country is by far one of the best in the world, if for no other reason then it’s people.
So let us think about EVERYONE who HAS, DOES and WILL stand up to protect this Country and the people in it!God Bless this Country, it’s people and the ideals that it is based on!

Sorry, can't Blog today ...

So our computer decided to die.
It is a sad day for all.
Especially for you all because now you will have nothing to read about.
Being that I know that my life is the only thing that truly matters to you all!
What does this honestly mean though you might ask?
If not, you will find out … if you keep reading I guess that is …
Well, to break it down to the simplest form, we need a new computer.
So the hunt began … and it wasn’t fun I might add.
La Wife really could use a Mac for the things she wants to do.
I just need a simple something to bump around on the internet with.
So were does that leave us?
That’s right, La Wife needs a Mac.
We, being of a more humble stock, can not afford said computer.
So I was talking at work and one of my lackeys came and told me of a new product.
It is an external device that you plug into a USB port and then go buy the Mac operating system and low and behold you can now run it on your PC.
It costs about $200 and then the Mac OPS is about another $150ish so for less then $400 you can have the best of both worlds!
A cheep computer that you can update as needed for way less, and then also the Mac OPS that everyone loves O so much.
So now we have a plan … we can do this right?
I, being the man of the house who makes all of the decisions because La Wife lets me, left our little cave on an adventure to buy a new computer.
I drove to the all wonderful Buy the Best store.
I looked around to see if everything was as I saw online during my searches and seeing that it was decided what I wanted and being a manly man carried it to the front … and then grabbed a buggy because being that I am a man I forgot to get a buggy as I walked in … shush!
I paid with the almighty credit card thinking how we finally got it paid off and now as things go in 3’s I will need it for some car repair and at least 1 Wonder Dog visit in the near future.
I took said piece of magical technology back to the cave and that’s when it went to the proverbial south.
Why is it called south anyway?
I mean doesn’t everyone like coming to the south?
We have the best food, Disney (Barf) and beaches?
O, that’s right south as in Hell … my bad it is still early …
I put my magical box together and start it up … thinking I might not have becoue it is so quiet … yea you can’t hear it running … so at first I thought it was broken already!
I popped open my magical box and attempted to install my old hard drive into it that I backed everything up onto … and low and behold they have changed so it doesn’t fit.
OK, I can work with this.
I move stuff on from my portable hard drive and finish all the installs and then go back to the all mighty Buying of the Best store and ask for a converter … low and behold they have one.
Well of course they do because if I thought of it someone else had to have thought of it years ago because I just cannot get a great ideal first.
So, I buy the converter and bring it home … low and behold it works too!
Now I am thinking though, it is slow and only works through a USB port so I don’t like it, it looks tacky.
I am going to finish transferring all of the information and then take it back and get another internal hard drive.
The question is, is that wrong?
I am going with no because it is for my personal gain and they have a return policy for a reason … yea I will be able to sleep after this one with little lack of sleep I am sure.
After the external drive is done transferring that is … in another 20 hours … and then I will do the other hard drive … so Monday’ish I will return it and continue on with my new putter story.
When did these things get so difficult?

What is Hell …

This is a topic just to throw up so I can say that I do a Blog every week … ish …

Is hell really filled up with nothing but bad people?
Or, do some of the bad people end up going to Heaven?
Can’t you picture it now?
Hitler ends up in Heaven, not because he is a good guy but because he was needed to make the Jews Heaven a little better so they can beat him up every once and awhile.
Or, is it that they are just so bad that God doesn’t want them rewarded by going into Hell, because he is afraid they will get patted on the back by Satan and given a nice position of power … you know like a torturer over the J-Walkers?
In that case, does God have a second Hell to keep them all seperated, hum?
Or, did Hitler end up going to Heaven because he was a needed soul.
You know one of the souls that have to do horrible things for the betterment of humanity.
I know, wow, is he really saying that Hitler had a positive effect over mankind?
Well, no … wait, in a way yes too …
He was a monster in so many ways and did so MANY, MANY horrible acts that I could never say that they would make him a ‘good’ person.
He was though a very powerful turning point for humanity toward a positive effect.
Yea, you know … we all became friends because we had a common enemy.
What brings people together quicker then fear?
So, that brings me back to what Hell is … I don’t know.
God, the most all powerful thing in the universe who created all things, instead of striking down the fallen angels he just let them leave to temp mankind and to rule over a dark place where the people who can’t get into Heaven seem to go.
Wait, could it all be part of some greater plan?
Remember my Blog about how God and Satan sitting down talking about things that need to be done and Satan stepping up because he wanted to please God … yea I didn’t’ think so, but I am just saying, it could have worked that way.
God might have put that spark of rebellion into Satan …wait he must have he created him after all didn’t he?
He also could have stoped him sooner, being that he knows what is to come and all but he didn’t …
So latter Satan would lead the rebellion and take over the underworld … wow, I am starting to sound like some kind of Satan lover aren’t I … this, I hope, is being read as I intend it to be written and not as I am praising Satan or something.
This is one of the times I contemplate hitting backspace, a lot … especially if I ever want to get into politics this would SURLY be used against me!
Back to what Hell is …
Some would say it is some flaming pit … well not the Catholics, to children anyway … yea about that, don’t we want them to be afraid of Hell so they behave?
Some would say it is just a void of nothing.
Some would say it is your worse fear of just something horrible.
Such as reliving some terrible thing over and over again.
Some would say that Hell is eternal and ever lasting.
What does the Bible say … come on people, read it yourself already and figure it out!
I can’t tell you all everything!
Back to some point like thing, people don’t talk about Hell … why is that it anyway, is it Taboo and no one sent me the memo?
I don’t know why really, it is kind of a BIG subject in what ever incarnation of faith that you look at isn’t it?
OK, unless you believe in reincarnation that is … I am going to be a dung beetle for sure!
My personal Hell would be something along the lines of losing my mind and then to wonder around not knowing anything other then the pains of my body in a lost scared place … mind you I think that is only a few decades away but not the point at the moment … also, only if the world doesn’t end in 2012 as we all suspect …
O, come on people I just wrote about it last week and you have already forgotten about it … not helping me feel like you all care!
Eternity is such a long time too … I have problems with that and think a loving God might too … can you get good behavior time off.
Then again what is good behavior in Hell?
You torture and hurt people all day … this is starting to hurt my head …
I can see it now, you get a 1-week vacation but the world is destroyed by then and Heaven will not let you in … yea sounds like a blast
I have read a few books and watched a few movies that have made me think over time.
I am not so sure Hell is what we all think and fear it is … it isn’t good and I don’t think it is eternal but then again … time would be different there I think also.
You know like when you fall asleep for 5 min and have a dream that takes weeks it seems in your head.
If we don’t have bodies to keep track of time who is to say that our minds will not know how long time is, and it is then slowed down to prolong the torment?
La Wife and I have said that we would be willing to give up our souls for eternity to be stuck in Hell if we got 2 things out of it.
1) Everyone we care about gets to go to Paradise and/or Heaven
2) We get to remember why we ended up in Hell.

I am not sure whom I would allow into my bunch of people so you all need to be nice to me or I might forget your name that day … like the do at the Academy Awards.
All I am saying is, don’t forget the reason we are all supposed to be good … you know so we don’t end up going there!
Mind you, it would be nice to see everyone I know on a daily bases …

End of the World …

So I have been thinking about the topic line for some time now.
Most religions say that the end is near.
Mostly, in my opinion anyway, because they have been saying it for a couple thousand years now and they have to keep the story going.
A lot of other people, OK not as many … ok not so many after all but I am thinking enough to throw this though in as well, think that the end of the world will come at the end of the Mayan calendar.
Something strange does happen at that time and that is that the planets will all be in alignment for the first time in some stupid amount of time like 80 million years or something crazy, sorry I have forgotten the exact number.
Well the good news is it isn’t the end of the world according to more then a few ‘scientist’ … well for most of us and with my luck I will be one of the many to die … it is the next reset and then we still have a few more era’s to live through that cycle until the next one about 5 thousand years latter.
According to the Mayan calendar that is.
Now we do need to worry about all of the Pisces being upset because there time is going to be over as they are forced to pass the torch on to the Aquarius’s, but hea, only if you believe in that Astrology stuff right?
This all brings up an interesting point.
I was thinking that if it was the end of the world then Christianity kind of got proven a lie.
I know, can’t wait for this one right …
Almost all of Revelations hasn’t happened yet so, if the last book of the Bible is a lie …
Then again, if it isn’t the end of the world just the time of challenge as so many other people think I guess that does kind of go with Revelations doesn’t it …
This is getting harder and harder to keep straight in my head, I am not sure what direction I am facing now so how do I decide what ancient pagan faith system to follow?!?!
If we can only find the other Crystal Skulls and figure out all of there secrets in time!
So, if it isn’t the end of the world, but a partial reset after some type of disaster or something and then the Mayan calendar keeps going into the 6th age what does that mean?
It means the end technology and going back to living and working the land.
I know this seems like rambling but I am going someplace, sorta.
OK, so lets say that the end is coming and lets look at our people today before the great reset and if it is a good ideal to have one …
We have become imperfect people haven’t we?
We have crimes now that people from the 50’s and 60’s could never, ever even imagine.
We have criminal actions now that laws haven’t even been made for.
Just this last week the 21 year old guy who beat up his 17 year old girlfriend and then took her 3 month old, not his child I might add, and drove down the road throwing it out the window killing if … yea and people ask why I think it isn’t a good world to try and raise a child in anymore.
There are laws against what he did, but come on, that’s just EVIL!
We have also grown to be a larger people now.
So, yes the population has increased but each of us is equal to 2 people form olden times.
Wow, that makes me feel even fatter … I need a fudge cycle to try and help me feel better!
Sure, go ahead and say it is because of the hormones in the food … you know the same hormones that have our children having ‘growth spurts’ at younger and younger ages, and I am not talking about height and you all know it, leading to even more sin in the world.
(Lina Medina, a Peruvian girl from the Andean village of Ticrapo who made medical history when she gave birth to a boy by caesarean section in May 1939 at the age of five years, seven months and 21 days.)
Lets go a head and point a few problems with this shall we …
1) The father is who?
2) She would have had to have been impregnated when she was 4
3) To say she is a child is the understatement of the year!!!

So, what do I think could be a reason for that you might ask, ok more then likely not but to tie all of this in I have to keep going with this people so brace yourselves …
Now back in the day Adam was created and he was considered perfect, right?
So over time we de-evolved into what we are now.
Adam, I think at least, was around 3 feet tall and possibly had very large and fuzzy feet.
I also think he loved to eat around 6 meals a day and lived a fun and enjoyable life napping at least once a day.
God it was good to be a Hobbit!
Then over time his children and grand children came across more and more sin and did worse and worse things causing them to slowly be filled with evil to the point that they were full of it.
That’s right it isn’t evolution that caused us to grow it is the additional need for room as our sin grew.
If you are still reading this you either really like me or have nothing better to do!
2000 average height of a man = 6’0
1800 average height of a man = 5’4
Medieval man was around 5’7 … again the time of evil so they got bigger …
Romans around 5’0 … see by my math people before Rome had to be short because Rome was bad, so the Hobbit ideal is starting to work for you too isn’t it?
I will not keep going with this … I know thank God, this is you all’s fault for saying I need to write more I might add!
So what do we have now to look forward to … how about in the near future we will become a group of Nephilim running all around the world.
That’s right, over time the Devil and his other fallen angels have tricked us into becoming this evil race of people.
They didn’t breed with us … well ok some of them might have, but they have forced there influence a pone us changing us over time and making us take actions that would have dire consequences over time with just little twists and turns here and there that we never realized until now, when we are in such a state that we are doomed.
Little things like using fossil fuels and then having politicians think it was a good ideal to take money form the big companies as so we would keep using them.
Injecting hormones into our food to get bigger and better meat … now look at our children …
All kinds of little things.
So, back to the point, if the world is going to end, would it be such a bad thing in the long run?
So what if, Jesus comes back after the ‘End of the World’ … would it look something like this then?

Mother Earth and the few people left on it can learn from our mistakes and hopefully, just hopefully not make the same ones.

That’s that, thank you for going along this little ride with me, and this is what you get when you ask me to write … all your fault people!!!

Inner Peace …

I have not been so happy with my job lately, like everyone else I know.
Also, I know, and I am just happy to have a job right now so drop it and listen to me cry about this already!
I thought that changing it up and going back into the security aspect of it would help … I think that made it worse.
I am not this bad mind you … I just wanted to use this picture.

(HEHE)

I now have to work with a bunch of people who are, well, stupid.
I am trying to be modest, honestly I am, but I am a light year ahead or so of some of these people.
No, not the inmate’s people, the other staff!
They think they know it all, and that they know what is going on.
Guess what, if you have only been around for 2 years you don’t know anything about the system or the games that MUST be played.
We all know we have to play games and put on different faces with different people and supervisors.
In a prison though it is a LITTLE different!
I have learned how to play a lot of the games, becosue of this I have one of the most longed for jobs where I work … honest!
I openly admit my nose is brown from time to time so shut up and move on!
These people upset me to say the least and make me want to smack them.
As much fun as that would be I can’t so, that means I need to figure out how to pass all this anger and hostility and go back to appreciating what I have.
So I need to find something to help me realign my Chi … this is going to be hard to believe and I hope that all of you are sitting down when you read what I am about to type, but, cartoons aren’t cutting it anymore!
I think I have figured out how to fix it though, and I think it is wrong too …
I think I have found an inner peace that neither Mother Teresa nor Gahundi could find. I fear Budda and even Jesus for that matter might have never found this level of inner peace as I have. What ever could it be?
These people had wonderful lives filled with good deeds and did such powerful actions of good that they have been forth onto a legendary status.
What is it I have found that could possibly compare???
I know lets see if I can give you all a clue … what do all of these people have in common?
No, not a lack of sex you perverts and according to the Catholic church’s way of trying to force beliefs out that a certain book was all lies and that the FICTION label on the front of it wasn’t good enough making me believe that it might be based on more truth they are willing to say … shut up that makes since to me and I am not re-writing it out!
I mean Jesus was the Son of God born to a mortal woman and raised by a mortal household with mortal friends.
What does that mean?
All I am saying is, well, he was, as we would see it now, a Rock Star and we all know how they live …
How about all of them were against violence?
That’s right, none of them know what it feels like to be in a fight … OK Gahundi does but it was always kind of one sided with him …
The truth is, I am a violent person and I blame my Dog for that … O come on we all know someone has to get blamed because I am not taking the heat for this … also who can stay mad at Wonder Dog … OK Fuzzy Pawed Demon can I guess …
I am surviving a little by playing WII Boxing … go ahead and laugh and when you are done come over here and I will show you it isn’t as big of a joke as you might think … it will hurt you people!
I am also walking around at night doing a self mediating during the walk, you know thinking how wonderful it would be to put these stupid peoples heads in a vice and see just how many turns it would take to get them to pop like a watermelon … yea told you I had issues and you all just think I am under exadurating (I think that’s how it is spelled?)!I have looked into finding a martial arts class in my area and just kind find anything that will fit my needs … AKA violent enough!

No, I am not thinking about going on a killing spree or even acting on my thoughts of wanting to smack these people in the head, but it does cross my mind that a good smacking could not hurt them.

Also, I will not act of these things because they might hit back and then I will get hurt and fall down and cry and La Wife will have to nurse me back to health and my ego will be destroyed forever as I come to the complete realization that I am a wimp … at this point I can still think I stand a chance at least … after everyone beets me up I will be crushed L
I like violence … it makes me happy … I need help!!!

Thank god for rules and laws …

How the economy has hurt us …

Some people have not really felt the effects of the economy.
You know, the rich people who don’t know what a days work is being that they have never done one!
The rest of us have scene gas prices go up, food prices rise because of gas prices going up and so many other variations that are to many to say in this silly part of the web I call my own, AKA my Bloguverse.
I, like so many others, have not gotten a raise in years.
There is even now a bill trying to take away 4 recent of my pay because us state employees make too much I guess.
Wow, when did that start and what am I doing with all that crazy cash?
It must be La Wife taking all of it to buy shoes, then having a storage unit to keep them in, then the gas to and fro to said storage unit to get said shoes … yea I think it is just a lie being put forth from our lovely government.
You know, the people that we elected in to keep us safe and protect us from things like this from happening!
I have a thought, lets see … if I voted for the pay cut, after they just gave themselves one I might add, does that sound like a good ideal if I wanted to get re-elected?
I mean ALL of the state employees must have a little voting power … right?
La Wife and I are living on the High Hog in real life terms.
We have a house, 2 vehicle (That are reliable) and jobs with benefits that don’t make us hate ourselves everyday when we go to them.
In this modern world that is saying so much!
We have had to cut out on … wait actually we haven’t had to change anything and in fact bought a new house, so again I have no room to complain.
This week though something did effect me.
I don’t normally talk about other people, so please take this as and for what it is …
Something bad, and all around rather upsetting.
We, who live in Central Florida anyway, know a man.
Some would say a Legend and some might say a myth when it comes to some of the stories about his greatness.
This man, has been called a Messiah.
He has single handedly whooped more men behind completely random locations then any combination of gangs out on the streets can claim as a whole.
He has written music to entertain us, making us both laugh and cry at times
He has supported our troops and stood up for the underdog.
So, if you haven’t figured it out, or heard because it did make the Orlando Sentinel’s front page … Bubby ‘Whoop Ass’ Wilson was let go do to budget cuts from Clear Channel Communications only show standing up against Howard Stern, The Monster in the Morning.
I know this kind of sounds like a joke but I think I need to pay some tribute to this man.
All joking aside …
He has made me laugh, he has made me darn near cry at times, he has made me stop and think, he has reminded me DAILY that we have troops over seas and then reminded me why they were over there.
I have listened to him for over a decade, wow that’s a long time now that I think about it.
The Monsters will go on, unhappily I might add form what they keep saying, and they will also keep supporting him, having him on the show when ever they can … just without pay.
So, the big economy finally hit me and I don’t like it!
Thanks a lot all you government types who are supposed to be looking out for us and just refuse to because money is more important then keeping your word as to what you would do for us as, the people depending on you.
It hurt me because I have lost someone I enjoy before his time.
I have it easy though.
He, like so many other people in the US, is now unemployed and having to worry about his family and how to pay the bills.
Wow, thanks big business and government!
We might be the greatest place in the world to live, and I do believe that, but I’ll be darned if we don’t need some help up in Washington!
I should run for some type of government position, I don’t know how to make people believe that I am going to look out for them but darn it I’m not going to get paid off and side with the wrong group for just a few bucks in my pocket!

So Bubba, like you have done to and for so many others, I salute you!
Thank you for ‘Ready for the Weekend’, ‘Southern Girls’ and every other song you have ever written.
To say you will be missed is a grave understatement …

So I was watching TV, and …

I somehow got hooked on watching Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.
For the few, the proud, the kept in a closet way to long because they still don’t understand why ‘I’ll be back’ is silly … this show is based on the Terminator movies.
You know, robots take over the world after AI is perfected and then they decide that humans are bad and try to kill us all … not being bale to they send the Governor of California back in time to kill the mother of the leader of the resistance … yea weak but it works and still makes money!
So, this is her life story, or was I should say because it just got canceled (Darn you Fox!)
Lets see if I can get back to some semblance of a point here …
I got an I-Phone!
I know, not what you were thinking but it does apply!
I love my phone!
I was going to get a second computer for La Wife and I but then I got a wonderful gift from some guy I think … yea it was a guy … why did he give it to me … was it stolen … why didn’t I go back to his place for that lollypop either now that I think about it …
O’ yea, back to the point …
I don’t think I can live without it now.
It doesn’t rule my life, but, it isn’t to far off I fear!
It does everything, no really people, almost literally everything.
So, what is the next step?
How far away from good old HAL 9000 are we at this point?
At what point are we going to let the computers take over, O come on, you know it isn’t to far off into the future.
We relay on computer so much now.
Try and go a week without touching one and tell me how long that lasts.
Work = Mandatory
Military = Mandatory
Personal life = … yea I will go with Mandatory!
Does the government have a back up plan for if the power goes out?
Does anyone know how to do just about anything anymore without Google or a print out?
I have said it before but America doesn’t produce anything.
We are consumers.
What does that mean when the power fails and we have to survive?
More then likely the rest of the world will be in the same boat … not that we will know because we can’t call them!
So, we don’t produce enough food to carry us over for very long.
Then again, how are we going to go about paying for things because none of us have cash anymore and the banks will not be working.
What about medications?
Without computers and machine companies how are we going to make them?
Wait a second … this might work out … this could be the answer to world overpopulation …
First off, everyone in the hospital and nursing homes will pass away …
Second, all of the rich snobs who don’t know how to work for a living will die off …
Thirdly, all of the politicians will be eaten because we will need food and lets face it we as American’s love our meat … they are a little fat most of them but we can use there fat as wax and blubber to keep us warm at night.
Then only the strong will survive!
They will not be able to drive answer mind you because the pumps don’t work, but they will survive!
Lets see who will make it …
Farmers and back woods hillbillies!
Yeppers, you know what will happen 5 years after the rednecks and hillbillies take over is don’t you?
That’s when the Intergalactic Federation of Planets will come down and see how our development is coming … and make us down as a ‘Do not bother coming back’ planet …
Not that any of this matters because in 2012 it’s all over anyway … Then I will get to meet God and ask all the important questions …
What ever happened to Hoffa’s body?
What really happened to Hitler?
Why did we all care about JR enough to ask who shot him, wasn’t it enough that someone did already?
If Larry, Darryl and Darryl were all figments of Newheart’s dream, what did they represent?
How is it that a man can only draw with a puppet on his hand?
Where did B.A. keep all the spare body parts for his van?
If the little builder people know that the Fraggle’s are going to eat what they are building … why not move?
Speaking of Fraggle’s, if Popeye couldn’t make kids eat Spinach, what makes you think a piece of cloth with a hand in it’s bum can make kids eat radishes?
Did the Pigs in Space every figure out why they were there?
On that subject … Why did everyone keep lying to, and giving Fozzie a chance at a comedy career?
These are just a few of the things running through my head … aren’t you glad it isn’t yours!Just thinking aloud to myself, and hoping that HAL never wakes up into a real thing … keep dreaming HAL, keep dreaming …