Onward moving onward …

Well the title is a lie, we are not moving anything because we got lied to … sorry misinformed …
I got a phone call today asking a few questions from a different person about our house and I decided to ask ‘Are you all still starting out here tomorrow?’
I then got the reply ‘No, more like Monday.’
Well, after a few dumbfounded moments I found out that the sales person was wrong about the start date and that he wasn’t supposed to say anything because he doesn’t work in that department.
Long story short, we can look at the house but that’s about it.
So, now that we have moved our bed, most of our kitchen and all kinds of other things to where we will be staying for a week … we find out we didn’t have to bother and that the time between getting the house done and our vacation is now cut down to 1 week.
So, BIG wrench thrown at us … not to mention I have to reschedule a delivery, Satellite installation and the Phone hook up now.

Needless to say, we are perturbed!

We were talking in the car, on our way back from getting out pots and pans, about something that Peta is trying to do … wait for this one … talk about out of left field with this topic …

They asked Ben and Jerry’s to use, wait for it … Human Mother’s Milk instead of Cow!
I know, Cow milk is SO good, except for Skim that should not exist, why change!
They say that it is cruel to the Cows and how Human Mothers Milk is better for us.
Wow, OK, so we have a LARGE Milk demand here in the states so lets see if I can figure this out …
If a Cow produces roughly 6 gallons of milk a day equaling about 57 pounds. (Information gotten from Wikipedia)
Now I am all about the breasts, but how many women would it take to get that kind of turn over … an average woman produces about 25 ounces a day … so every 5 women would make about a gallon … so 30 women to equal what a cow does?
(Again Info gotten from Wikipedia)

So, me being me, I have it all planned out!
We need a few things first though …
1) A Large Air Conditioned Warehouse
2) Modified Milking apparatuses from 8 to 2
3) Lots of Basic Televisions that get the local ‘Shows’ AKA Soap Operas
4) Comfy chairs
5) Woman willing to sit around and do nothing all day but watch TV

I was thinking then … the hard part is to find the women willing to help out.
Not as hard as you might think … Government Aid Lines!
We have the perfect target group … now we will need to worry about diseases in the milk and other small problems but I think Peta might be on to something!

If nothing else, they can at least help reduce the cost to the rest of us by making their own Government Milk, Butter and Cheese!
My Wife just added that we could possablly gather Yeast to help with the making of bread too!
Isn't she helpfull ... ... I think I am going to be sick!!!

I will let them drink the first glass though, last glass and every in-between!
Now doesn’t the Sign at the top make more since with a title like ‘Onward Moving Onward’?